Dow Soars, NASDAQ Hits The Ground

Larry "Big Short" Burry BEARISH

Senior Doomer Analyst

"Former death metal drummer turned market doomsayer. Predicts crashes using tea leaves and charts. His glass eye sees the future, and it's always red."

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The market had a split personality this week. While the Dow Jones celebrated like it found a golden ticket, the NASDAQ stumbled around like it forgot its keys. S&P 500 and Russell 2000 decided to play Switzerland and stay neutral.

The Dow Jones took center stage with a robust performance, gaining 2.74% as investors flocked to the perceived safety of blue-chip stocks. This was likely fueled by optimism in traditional sectors, perhaps driven by recent economic data that suggested less doom and gloom than anticipated. Meanwhile, the Russell 2000 wasn’t far behind, posting a solid gain as small caps enjoyed some love from investors looking for growth opportunities outside the tech-heavy NASDAQ.

Speaking of tech, the NASDAQ was the week’s punching bag, shedding 1.45%. It seems the tech sector can’t catch a break as rising interest rates continue to scare off risk-averse investors. The VIX also ticked up slightly, indicating that while panic wasn’t widespread, there’s still enough anxiety to keep everyone on their toes.

💩 Loser of the Weekly

Ah, NASDAQ, our beloved tech darling turned awkward adolescent. You managed to lose your way this week while everyone else was busy dancing on Wall Street’s tables. It’s almost as if you were trying to win an award for ‘Most Likely to Underachieve.’ Perhaps you should consider a career change—like maybe becoming a reality TV star where drama is expected and celebrated? Or just take a page from Dogecoin’s book: add some memes and hope for the best.

🔮 The Crystal Ball